Shoeboxes!

I’m am not the best parent in the world. I know this for sure and today was a bitter reminder. My daughter needed a shoebox. I thought it was due Friday so no big deal I still had time to find one. NOOOO! It’s today mommy T O D A Y! And so we began to look for a box. I am in no way into shoes. I know it’s unnatural for a woman to only have a few pairs of shoes, I hate touching feet so I hate trying on shoes and to even send me into a shoe store grosses me to the max.

The hunting expedition began I looked in the downstairs closets, then ventured upstairs, I was shocked at what I found. My son’s room was littered with opened books and magazines. He had a couple of shirts draped over things, and I don’t want to know what made that noise from under his bed. The bathroom was sporting a dirty mirror and yesterday’s outfit on the floor along with plastic fish and lizards. The game room was a disaster, it looked as if Toys R Us threw up. Now for Miss Littles room stuffed animals were everywhere along with her jacket, a shirt, a dress, and several other things. My voice got louder with each room.


I need to explain that I am working nights and took on more hours this week.


I still can’t find a shoebox and we are running a bit late. I drop her off just in time, go home shower, and head out for this darn box. As I went from store to store I began to realize how much I have been dropping the ball on this kind of stuff. I tried to cheer myself up with "But Milly you did send juice boxes and napkins to school for this month’s birthday parties." At the shoe store they had only one to spare and it was gross. " I can’t seem to get it together this year. I forget about some of the things going on at the school. Now Milly you sent crackers" The dollar store didn’t have a box. "This is why people home school, shoe boxes!" "It’s the teacher’s fault" The office supply store didn’t have it, nor did Michael’s unless I wanted to pay almost ten dollars for a set of two. I did what I could only think of doing at that moment I called my husband, after all we are in this together. Now my husband isn’t always practical in his thinking. Call C. and see if she has one. I’d spend just as much in gas to get it from her, not to mention the time. She can bring one tomorrow when they come over. It’s due today. I then let loose about the rooms as he attempted to explain to me that his lunch was about to be eaten by someone else if I didn’t shut up. I did. The lady at the clothing store didn't feel right about giving me one because she gives them to a church and security would have to walk me out and we don’t want to ask them to do that. As I drove to Target I began to really doubt my parenting and her teaching. At Target they had a box for $6.99, a box, it’s a box. I decided to go back to one of the stores for the set of two because at least I could make use of one. As I walked out I decided to ask if they had a box that I could have. The girl looked at me turned and pulled out an empty box. I was so thankful, she might have thought I was a nut.


I quickly rushed to the school with the box of mommy love so that I wouldn’t suck quite as much at being a mommy. After making the loop twice because when it snows it means park however you want in Oklahoma. (It also means lanes what lanes? We don’t need no stink’n lanes on the highway) I wanted to just park in the handicap spot for a moment but upon observing the sheriff’s department car in front of the school and thinking that they are not in a good mood being that they have to do some rather difficult things. So to explain that I was in need of a moment of being a good mommy, I would have been holding a ticket for sure. I parked and went in. I heard whispering and could tell that in fact I’m not the worst parent ever. I brought the box to the class. The teacher smile and thanked me. Now yuo know I wanted to be good and just hug my kid and leave, I honestly did. I so wasn't. I said "You know these are hot comities, I went to several stores to get one." "She said you know any shoe box sized box would do the trick" Yes I thought, with darkness in my tone. Doesn’t she realize that we would have had to pay a hunk of money! Instead I smiled. I want you to know that the next words out of her mouth almost sent me over the edge, this my friends was sheer restraint on my part, she had the nerve to say it after what I had just been through, she said "It’s funny I have lot’s of them at home."


Now that is funny, that is make you rush around begging for them, touching gross stuff spilled in one, explain why you need it over and over again, freak out, slide in the snow, get stuck, trying to leave, make you want to have a melt down, eat chocolate, I need a nap. . . funny.


I still won’t home school because one day like this is worth moments like what I’m about to do. That’s right. . . take that nap.