Saturday, February 06, 2010

She loved the earth

This is the time when I don’t love being here.
I can smell the flowers
I wish I knew why
I can see his heart breaking . . . so young
The scent of the flowers waft over me
She had a great life in front of her
Good friends
The yellow roses are stunning
The music seems to be dragging . . . I won’t want that
Are those lilies?
I can’t take them . . . they smell great but make me sick
The placement is wrong . . . I hate it
Who loves it?
They can almost touch the . . .
When did things go wrong?
Yes they are lilies. . . I hope they don’t make me sick
The lady next to me knows how they feel, sort of . . . she’s lost . . . a. . .
If my eyes start watering no one will know it’s the lilies
She loved the earth
I would have changed that background
I should have asked if they needed help
I should have gone upstairs
It’s fine no one cares about a background
Those are lovely words about her
The flowers are nice
He looks stunned
I want to hug him I want to hold him
I want to take the pain away . . . he’s a cool kid . . . always happy to see me
She must have known how special her little brother is. . yet. . .
I think the heat coming on is blowing the scent of the flowers to me
In the quiet of the night . . . the pain . . . sets forth the idea . . . of killing the pain
I remember the loss to suicide

1 comment:

kc bob said...

I lost a friend to suicide the week before last.. I am still grieving that loss.. I still feel very sad about the way that my friend died.